Yesterday morning my daughter asked me: “Mom can I eat cake for breakfast”? The day before she had made little cakes together with her best friend. Of course with frosting. They did a good job – they even cleaned up the kitchen afterwards.
So I told her: “Yes you can. We can make Mother’s Day a bit a Daughters Day as well.”
She ends up cutting her little cake in two pieces to add a layer of Nutella in the middle. I have to smile. She is so much like me. I nonetheless decide to stick with my super low-fat yoghurt with fresh strawberries and a little muesli. We are invited to a brunch so there will be more than enough calories coming my way soon.
We end up talking about food. About how it is perfectly fine to treat yourself – now and then – when you eat healthy in general. My daughter recalls that my mom was extremely strict with us when it came to food. She knows very well that when my siblings and I were small we had the eat absolutely EVERYTHING that was put on our plates. Even if that meant sitting at the dinner table for half an hour after everyone had left. (Even when we ate liver for dinner – iggit – iggit – iggit.)
She asked me why I am not that strict with them. I have to let that sink for a moment. I would like them to try everything, but I am indeed way less strict. At the same time, I totally get where my mom was coming from. My sister, brother and myself all have a very healthy relationship with food. Which I do think we owe her. We like pretty much all food. (Except liver :-) – although even that I enjoyed when at one point in time my husband and I had a six course surprise dinner . . . )
I told me daughter that I am not sure why I am doing things differently. I can only second guess. But there is one thing that I would like her to remember. It is a German saying. It says: “Ich kann, weil ich will was ich muss.“
I can because I want what I must.
I explain her what I mean by this. In my ideal world, I would not need to tell here to eat vegetables. In this ideal situation, she tries all vegetables just by herself. I don’t not to ask, I don’t need to beg, I don’t need to dictate. All I need to do is explain why it is important to eat vegetables. And explain that if you can make yourself do things – even when you do not like them – you are going to be a much stronger person. And life needs more strong people.
I tell her, I would like you just to eat the vegetables because you know you can what you must.
This is all just a 5-minute chat at breakfast. While having a Nutella cake.
That evening I am preparing dinner. For the first time in my life, I make “Schnitzel”. My husband says you do not make Schnitzel” you prepare Schnitzel. I feel like I make “Schnitzel” :-)
I make tons of noise while hammering the meat thinner and thinner. It is quite fun. Then I prepare three plates. One with flour, one with egg and one with (Thermomix made) breadcrumbs.
My daughter comes into the kitchen and is intrigued. Together we prepare the 4 Schnitzel. They look just perfect. I am very proud of myself :-) Ha, I still think you make Schnitzel.
Soon we all sit at the table and enjoy these wonderful Schnitzel. The vegetable of the day is Beetroot.
I know my daughter thinks beetroot is disgusting . . . I love it though, and so does my husband. I decide not to say a word. Then I hear her say: “Daddy, can you give me just a few slides of beetroot please”.
I was too distracted (perhaps by my oh so perfect Schnitzel :-)) to make any comment on that. It wasn’t until this morning that I recalled her saying that. My head suddenly made that connection. Between that one sentence last night and that conversation we had that morning.
I can because I want what I must.
I could not be a prouder mother. The world needs more strong people. Raising one is the most awesome feeling.
The perfect Mother’s Day.
